Showing posts from July, 2012


*I have been making my family eat at the dinner table.  And not just eat at the table but talk at the table.  I set the table with place-mats and plates and napkins and I put the food on the table in nice bowls and we eat 'family-style' because we are a family.
Before we ate standing up and sitting down.  In front of the T.V. and all that other stuff they tell you not to do.  The very things that makes you anti-social and anti-family and anti-healthy: mind, body and soul.
Now that we eat at the table with food and talking I noticed my kitchen is cleaner and the dishes get done faster and we are all happier, better human beings because of it.  Mind.  Body. Soul.

*I hate talking about current events but lately current events have caused my very world to be sucky.  Mostly it's easy to say I hate people and people suck. Mostly it's easy not to see the good.  To develop this sort of apathy to the world around me.
 People are such strange creatures.  It's weirdly stran…

i can has english

I like to go back and read my old post and see how terrible my grammar was and still is.  If it were not for the red squiggly line I'd be talking about my spelling too. My problem is I can't edit myself.  It's impossible.  Well not impossible just damn hard.  It's hard to be in my head and the word come out wrong and I can read it a hundred times and never catch a simple error like you're instead of your. And no one reads my blog much so no one says anything but I think it's because people don't want to be assholes and correct me.  My husband always corrects me, I equally love and hate him for that.  I use to say 'libary' until he corrected me.  And I was all like "Fuck you man I'll call it what ever I want to call it" so I call it a 'library' now.  You can be stubborn or you can be right and mostly I want to be right.  Being stubborn is highly overrated.  And now I hate everyone who never corrected my ignorance.  Every teacher…

So Emotional

I have an over-emotional daughter. This of course should come at no surprise, being that I am always a heartbeat away from some type of breakdown. I wear my heart on my sleeve.  Being a constant emotional being is a trait passed down on the mother's side, along with big breasts and stringy hair.
Passed mother to daughter who becomes a mother who passes it to her daughter.
You can say that it is all objective and because she is mine I might be over-critical.  I will tell you you are wrong.
I have witnesses.
One day my daughter was playing a few backyards away with friends, myself on my deck reading, sipping wine, listening to the play going on.  All of a sudden a heart-crushing tear filled scream.  I knew.  I rolled my eyes and prepared for the least.  My neighbors on the other hand were not prepared.  One came rushing out like a paramedic running to a five car pile-up the other left their towel draped naked toddler, who just got out of the bath, in his room.  Running, fear in the…

Farts Legos and Edgar Allan Poe

*You think after Fart-Fest 2012 I'd stop eating dairy all together.  But I can't.  I try to limit it but every 'Taco Tuesday' rolls around and I am back at square one.  I already gave up the glut, I can't give up the lact too.
You'd think it be hard to give up gluten and flour and all the good things that come with it.  But it isn't.  I am more horrified to give up ice cream than I am a cookie.  I can deal with the chalky taste of a wheat-free cookie.  I can't deal with the after-taste of any soy ice cream.  What does this say about me?

*I helped my son build a Lego light house.  Correnction: My son helped me build a Lego light house.  Because we'd start it together and suddenly I looked over he was gone and I was still working on it.  Or he was at his friend's house and I was like "Oh I'll just do the next step for him."  And five steps later I am still working, yelling "Come on you little fuckers connect."

*  You know …


Jim Carrey humor with a heart of gold. Happy birthday to my Nollie Pollie Ollie.

Weekly Stats

Kids: Happy
Reading: The Book Thief (Great)
Read: The Wilder Life (Wonderful)
Listening to:

Goals: Read. Write. Enjoy.

Score: Four stars

Abortion Suckers

Did I shock you with that title?  Linked. and Baited.

I went to a small town parade this weekend, it was lovely.  Floats and bands and businesses and local politicians selling their wares, throwing candy at little children.  I can't sit through commercials on T.V. but for some reason I can watch them floating down the street handing me fliers as I sit in my foldable lawn chair.   Good times.  Good times.  I am always a bit uncomfortable taking anything from people walking in parades, I don't like things forced on me, well except Tootsie Rolls. Tootsie Rolls and a estimate on roof repair.   Good thing there is always an over abundance of Tootsie Rolls and estimates at parades.   This festive holiday parade gave me Tootsie Rolls and Flavor-Ices and estimates and VBS flyers and Abortion Suckers. Little round lollipops handed out to adults and children with little baby feet on the sucker and a quote on the stick telling you that the little feet you are about to lick are that of a …