Monday, February 8, 2010

Anxious Still but Not Taking it Lying Down

I am still here. In Real Life stuff has taken over and I have been living it and not documenting it. It is a good thing and a bad thing. Because as much as I love living, I still enjoying looking back and remembering.
These past weeks have been spent planning and putting on a fundraiser for Meg's school. And I did it. A to Z, with a breakdown between M and N and S and T, but I did it.
It is kind of a big deal for me. I am looking at this accomplishment as a big deal. Because so many times I wanted to quit, have I ever mentioned I am good at quitting, cause I am. But I didn't. The anxiety got to me. That's anxiety for you, it is the devil on your shoulder reminding you that the work is too hard. And telling you you can't do the things deep down you know you can do.
Anxiety makes your heart clinch and your palms sweat. It makes you doubt yourself, and beats you down and then pummels a little more.
But I made it through. And I finished it. And I did it.
Of course not by myself. I had help, which of course was the other big deal cause I asked for help. I was on a roll.
Take that anxiety.

3 comments:

  1. Way to go!! Major accomplishments, both. Anyone who can plan and implement a school fundraiser with only a handful of breakdowns and without quitting is my hero!

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  2. I find it amazing that I read your post, and feel like I could have written it.

    Taking a deep breath, and karate-chopping the devil on my shoulder too.

    I had to stop documenting as well, but I am trying to get back. I love to look back too!

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Thanks for your comments- they are like pennies from heaven.