Ruminate

I have deep thoughts.  Deep.  Deep. Thoughts.  All the time.  They usually only make sense to me of course.  I ruminate a lot.  Some people use the word ruminate like it's a bad thing.  My mom, who worked in a mental institution, said they used ruminate when talking about patients with certain mental disorders.  Ruminate was the technical term they used for people who talked about the same thing over and over obsessively. 
I like to think my ruminating is the completely healthy kind but it is not.  I usually think of interactions with people and think of at least five different way I could have handled the situation.  My social anxiety prevents me from getting an interaction right the first time.  I usually resort to inappropriate humor.  Inappropriate humor is deceiving.  People always laugh at inappropriate humor.  The question is are they laughing because they truly thought my inappropriateness was funny or because they are uncomfortable. 

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